Yo Momma...
#1
01-03-2006, 12:11 PM
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Lotsa places, currently Metro D.C., USA
Posts: 13,574
Yo Momma...
Got jokes?
It's teh "unofficial" Yo Momma joke thread. Hit us with yo best! No limits! (especially simce this ain't directed at NEbody in particular) Age. Color. Weight. IQ. BRING IT!!!
We only trackin negative points... -1 point for each repeat you get caught leavin. Shows a lack of imagination.
So.
Beeches.
Yo mama's so fat, when she takes a shower, her feet don't get wet.
Yo mama's so greasy, she sweats Crisco.
Yo mama's gums are so black, she spits Chocolate Milk
Yo mama's missing a finger and can't count past 9.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to mail a letter with food stamps.
Yo mama's so fat, she stood in front of the Hollywood sign and it just said H d.
Yo mama's so old, when God said "let there be light" she was there to flick the switch.
That was just to get you losers started. I've got more... BELIEVE me, I've got LOTS more!
It's teh "unofficial" Yo Momma joke thread. Hit us with yo best! No limits! (especially simce this ain't directed at NEbody in particular) Age. Color. Weight. IQ. BRING IT!!!
We only trackin negative points... -1 point for each repeat you get caught leavin. Shows a lack of imagination.
So.
Beeches.
Yo mama's so fat, when she takes a shower, her feet don't get wet.
Yo mama's so greasy, she sweats Crisco.
Yo mama's gums are so black, she spits Chocolate Milk
Yo mama's missing a finger and can't count past 9.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to mail a letter with food stamps.
Yo mama's so fat, she stood in front of the Hollywood sign and it just said H d.
Yo mama's so old, when God said "let there be light" she was there to flick the switch.
That was just to get you losers started. I've got more... BELIEVE me, I've got LOTS more!
#2
01-03-2006, 12:27 PM
RE: Yo Momma...
Yo mama so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up
Yo mama so fat her nickname is "Lardo"
Yo mama so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.
Yo mama so fat were in her right now
Yo mama so fat people jog around her for exercise
Yo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone
Yo mama so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors
Yo mamma so fat you haveta roll over twice to get off her...
Yo mama so fat she was floating in the ocean and spain claimed her for then new world
Yo mama so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling Free *****
Yo mama so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!
Yo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!
Yo mama so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"
Yo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!"
Yo mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized
Yo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway
Yo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller
Yo mama so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets
Yo mama so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th
Yo mama so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too
Yo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"
Yo mama so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!
Yo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"
Yo mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.
Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.
Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.
Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock.
Yo mama so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!
Yo mama so fat she's got her own area code!
Yo mama so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!
Yo mama so fat God couldn't light Earth until she moved!
Yo mama so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!
Yo mama so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!
Yo mama so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago...
Yo mama so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg.
Yo mama so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!
Yo mama so fat her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky!
Yo mama so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the her good side!
Yo mama so fat she wakes up in sections!
Yo mama so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!
Yo mama so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of george washington's nose.
Yo mama so fat she rolled over 4 quarters and it made a dollar!
Yo mama so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!
Yo mama so fat when she bunje jumps she goes straight to hell!
Yo mama so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!!!
Yo mama so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!
Yo mama so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views!
Yo mama so fat she's on both sides of the family!
Yo mama so fat everytime she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!
Yo mama so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!
Yo mama so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in!
Yo mama so fat even her clothes have stretch marks!
Yo mama so fat she has a wooden leg with a kickstand!
Yo mama so fat she has to use a VCR as a beeper!
Yo mama so fat she broke her leg, and gravy poured out!
Yo mama so fat when she rides in a hot air balloon, it looks like she's wearin tights!
Yo mama so fat she got hit by a parked car!
Yo mama so fat they have to grease the bath tub to get her out!
Yo mama so fat she has a run in her blue-jeans!
Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.
Yo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat people say "Taxi!"
Yo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway!
Yo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller!
Yo mama so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave she landed on 12th
Yo mama so fat when she bungee jumps she pulls down the bridge too
Yo mama so fat she steps on a scale & it goes one at a time please
Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it!
Yo mama so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck!
Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.
Yo mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.
Yo mama so fat they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping
Yo mama so fat when they used her underwear elastic for bungee jumping, they hit the ground.
Yo mama so fat when she back up she beep.
Yo mama so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.
Yo mama so fat she has to buy two airline tickets.
Yo mama so fat when she fell over she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again.
Yo mama so fat she influences the tides.
Yo mama so fat that when I tried to drive around her I ran out of gas.
Yo mama so fat she broke her leg and gravy fell out.
Yo mama so fat the animals at the zoo feed her.
Yo mama so fat she was baptized at Marine World.
Yo mama so fat she's on both sides of the family!
Yo mama so fat when she dances at a concert the whole band skips.
Yo mama so fat the Aids quilt wouldn't cover her
Yo mama so fat she stands in two time zones.
Yo mama so fat I tried to drive around her and I ran out of gas.
Yo mama so fat she left the house in high heels and when she came back she had on flip flops.
Yo mama so fat shes on both sides of the family
Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through
Yo mama so fat when she goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps.
Yo mama so fat that she cant tie her own shoes.
Yo mama so fat sets off car alarms when she runs.
Yo mama so fat she cant reach her back pocket.
Yo mama so fat when she wears one of those X jackets, helicopters try to land on her back!
Yo mama so fat her college graduation picture was an airial.
Yo mama so fat she lays on the beach and greenpeace tried to push her back in the water
Yo mama so fat she broke her leg and gravy poured out
Yo mama so fat she uses redwoods to pick her teeth
Yo mama so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures
Yo mama so fat she jumped in the air and got stuck.
Yo mama so fat she put on some BVD's and by the time they reached her waist they spelled out boulevard.
Yo mama so fat she sat on a dollar and squeezed a booger out George Washington's nose.
Yo mama so fat she stepped on a rainbow and made Skittles.
Yo mama so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon.
Yo mama so fat that when she sits on the beach, Greenpeace shows up and tries to tow her back into the ocean.....
Yo mama so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, she caused an eclipse.
Yo mama so fat she hoola-hooped the super bowl.
Yo mama so fat she was baptised in the ocean.
Yo mama so fat she has to iron her clothes in the driveway.
Yo mama so fat they tie a rope around her shoulders and drag her through a tunnel when they want to clean it.
Yo mama so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?"
Yo mama so fat when she stands in a left-turn lane it gives her the green arrow!
Yo mama so fat that when whe was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.
Yo mama so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes
Yo mama so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home and got 16 friends
Yo mama so stupid when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon
Yo mama so stupid she told everyone that she was "illegitiment" because she couldn't read
Yo mama so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind
Yo mama so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl
Yo mama so stupid you have to dig for her IQ!
Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!
Yo mama so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes!
Yo mama so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!
Yo mama so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone!
Yo mama so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money!
Yo mama so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight!
Yo mama so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!
Yo mama so stupid she took a cup to see Juice.
Yo mama so stupid that she sold the car for gas money.
Yo mama so stupid she asked you "What is the number for 911"
Yo mama so stupid she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
Yo mama so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "O.K."
Yo mama so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out.
Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.
Yo mama so stupid she took a spoon to the superbowl.
Yo mama so stupid she called Dan Quayle for a spell check.
Yo mama so stupid she stepped on a crack and broke her own back.
Yo mama so stupid she makes Beavis and Butt-Head look like Nobel Prize winners.
Yo mama so stupid she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train.
Yo mama so stupid she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif.
Yo mama so stupid when you stand next to her you hear the ocean!
Yo mama so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl
Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!
Yo mama so stupid she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds!
Yo mama so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!
Yo mama so stupid that she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
Yo mama so stupid she bought a videocamera to record cable tv shows at home.
Yo mama so stupid when she went to take the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead.
Yo mama so stupid she jumped out the window and went up.
Yo mama so stupid she thought a quarterback was an income tax refund.
Yo mama so stupid she took a umbrella to see Purple Rain.
Yo mama so stupid that under "Education" on her job apllication, she put "Hooked on Phonics."
Yo mama so stupid she put out the cigarette butt that was heating your house.
Yo mama so stupid she put lipstick on her forehead, talking about she was trying to makeup her mind.
Yo mama so stupid she watches "The Three Stooges" and takes notes.
Yo mama so fat her nickname is "Lardo"
Yo mama so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.
Yo mama so fat were in her right now
Yo mama so fat people jog around her for exercise
Yo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone
Yo mama so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors
Yo mamma so fat you haveta roll over twice to get off her...
Yo mama so fat she was floating in the ocean and spain claimed her for then new world
Yo mama so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling Free *****
Yo mama so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!
Yo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!
Yo mama so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"
Yo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!"
Yo mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized
Yo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway
Yo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller
Yo mama so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets
Yo mama so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th
Yo mama so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too
Yo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"
Yo mama so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!
Yo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"
Yo mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.
Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.
Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.
Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock.
Yo mama so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!
Yo mama so fat she's got her own area code!
Yo mama so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!
Yo mama so fat God couldn't light Earth until she moved!
Yo mama so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!
Yo mama so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!
Yo mama so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago...
Yo mama so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg.
Yo mama so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!
Yo mama so fat her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky!
Yo mama so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the her good side!
Yo mama so fat she wakes up in sections!
Yo mama so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!
Yo mama so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of george washington's nose.
Yo mama so fat she rolled over 4 quarters and it made a dollar!
Yo mama so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!
Yo mama so fat when she bunje jumps she goes straight to hell!
Yo mama so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!!!
Yo mama so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!
Yo mama so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views!
Yo mama so fat she's on both sides of the family!
Yo mama so fat everytime she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!
Yo mama so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!
Yo mama so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in!
Yo mama so fat even her clothes have stretch marks!
Yo mama so fat she has a wooden leg with a kickstand!
Yo mama so fat she has to use a VCR as a beeper!
Yo mama so fat she broke her leg, and gravy poured out!
Yo mama so fat when she rides in a hot air balloon, it looks like she's wearin tights!
Yo mama so fat she got hit by a parked car!
Yo mama so fat they have to grease the bath tub to get her out!
Yo mama so fat she has a run in her blue-jeans!
Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.
Yo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat people say "Taxi!"
Yo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway!
Yo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller!
Yo mama so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave she landed on 12th
Yo mama so fat when she bungee jumps she pulls down the bridge too
Yo mama so fat she steps on a scale & it goes one at a time please
Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it!
Yo mama so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck!
Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.
Yo mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.
Yo mama so fat they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping
Yo mama so fat when they used her underwear elastic for bungee jumping, they hit the ground.
Yo mama so fat when she back up she beep.
Yo mama so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.
Yo mama so fat she has to buy two airline tickets.
Yo mama so fat when she fell over she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again.
Yo mama so fat she influences the tides.
Yo mama so fat that when I tried to drive around her I ran out of gas.
Yo mama so fat she broke her leg and gravy fell out.
Yo mama so fat the animals at the zoo feed her.
Yo mama so fat she was baptized at Marine World.
Yo mama so fat she's on both sides of the family!
Yo mama so fat when she dances at a concert the whole band skips.
Yo mama so fat the Aids quilt wouldn't cover her
Yo mama so fat she stands in two time zones.
Yo mama so fat I tried to drive around her and I ran out of gas.
Yo mama so fat she left the house in high heels and when she came back she had on flip flops.
Yo mama so fat shes on both sides of the family
Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through
Yo mama so fat when she goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps.
Yo mama so fat that she cant tie her own shoes.
Yo mama so fat sets off car alarms when she runs.
Yo mama so fat she cant reach her back pocket.
Yo mama so fat when she wears one of those X jackets, helicopters try to land on her back!
Yo mama so fat her college graduation picture was an airial.
Yo mama so fat she lays on the beach and greenpeace tried to push her back in the water
Yo mama so fat she broke her leg and gravy poured out
Yo mama so fat she uses redwoods to pick her teeth
Yo mama so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures
Yo mama so fat she jumped in the air and got stuck.
Yo mama so fat she put on some BVD's and by the time they reached her waist they spelled out boulevard.
Yo mama so fat she sat on a dollar and squeezed a booger out George Washington's nose.
Yo mama so fat she stepped on a rainbow and made Skittles.
Yo mama so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon.
Yo mama so fat that when she sits on the beach, Greenpeace shows up and tries to tow her back into the ocean.....
Yo mama so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, she caused an eclipse.
Yo mama so fat she hoola-hooped the super bowl.
Yo mama so fat she was baptised in the ocean.
Yo mama so fat she has to iron her clothes in the driveway.
Yo mama so fat they tie a rope around her shoulders and drag her through a tunnel when they want to clean it.
Yo mama so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?"
Yo mama so fat when she stands in a left-turn lane it gives her the green arrow!
Yo mama so fat that when whe was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.
Yo mama so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes
Yo mama so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home and got 16 friends
Yo mama so stupid when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon
Yo mama so stupid she told everyone that she was "illegitiment" because she couldn't read
Yo mama so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind
Yo mama so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl
Yo mama so stupid you have to dig for her IQ!
Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!
Yo mama so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes!
Yo mama so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!
Yo mama so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone!
Yo mama so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money!
Yo mama so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight!
Yo mama so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!
Yo mama so stupid she took a cup to see Juice.
Yo mama so stupid that she sold the car for gas money.
Yo mama so stupid she asked you "What is the number for 911"
Yo mama so stupid she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
Yo mama so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "O.K."
Yo mama so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out.
Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.
Yo mama so stupid she took a spoon to the superbowl.
Yo mama so stupid she called Dan Quayle for a spell check.
Yo mama so stupid she stepped on a crack and broke her own back.
Yo mama so stupid she makes Beavis and Butt-Head look like Nobel Prize winners.
Yo mama so stupid she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train.
Yo mama so stupid she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif.
Yo mama so stupid when you stand next to her you hear the ocean!
Yo mama so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl
Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!
Yo mama so stupid she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds!
Yo mama so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!
Yo mama so stupid that she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
Yo mama so stupid she bought a videocamera to record cable tv shows at home.
Yo mama so stupid when she went to take the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead.
Yo mama so stupid she jumped out the window and went up.
Yo mama so stupid she thought a quarterback was an income tax refund.
Yo mama so stupid she took a umbrella to see Purple Rain.
Yo mama so stupid that under "Education" on her job apllication, she put "Hooked on Phonics."
Yo mama so stupid she put out the cigarette butt that was heating your house.
Yo mama so stupid she put lipstick on her forehead, talking about she was trying to makeup her mind.
Yo mama so stupid she watches "The Three Stooges" and takes notes.
#3
01-03-2006, 12:28 PM
RE: Yo Momma...
Yo mama so greasy she used bacon as a band-aid!
Yo mama so greasy she sweats Crisco!
Yo mama so greasy Texaco buys Oil from her
Yo mama has one leg and a bicycle.
Yo mama has 4 eyes and 2 pair of sunglasses.
Yo mama has so much hair on her upper lip, she braids it.
Yo mama has one hand and a Clapper.
Yo mama has green hair and thinks she's a tree.
Yo mama has one ear and has to take off her hat to hear what you're saying.
Yo mama has 10 fingers--all on the same hand.
Yo mama has a glass eye with a fish in it.
Yo mama has a short leg and walks in circles.
Yo mama has a short arm and can't applaude.
Yo mama has so many freckles she looks like a hamburger!
Yo mama has three fingers and a banjo.
Yo mama has a wooden leg with a kickstand on it.
Yo mama has a bald head with a part and sideburns.
Yo mama has a wooden leg with branches.
Yo mama has so many teeth missing, it looks like her tounge is in jail.
Yo mama so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio
Yo mama so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex.
Yo mama so skinny she turned sideways and dissapeared.
Yo mama so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs.
Yo mama so lazy she's got a remote control just to operate her remote!
Yo mama so lazy that she came in last place in a recent snail marathon.
Yo mama so greasy she sweats Crisco!
Yo mama so greasy Texaco buys Oil from her
Yo mama has one leg and a bicycle.
Yo mama has 4 eyes and 2 pair of sunglasses.
Yo mama has so much hair on her upper lip, she braids it.
Yo mama has one hand and a Clapper.
Yo mama has green hair and thinks she's a tree.
Yo mama has one ear and has to take off her hat to hear what you're saying.
Yo mama has 10 fingers--all on the same hand.
Yo mama has a glass eye with a fish in it.
Yo mama has a short leg and walks in circles.
Yo mama has a short arm and can't applaude.
Yo mama has so many freckles she looks like a hamburger!
Yo mama has three fingers and a banjo.
Yo mama has a wooden leg with a kickstand on it.
Yo mama has a bald head with a part and sideburns.
Yo mama has a wooden leg with branches.
Yo mama has so many teeth missing, it looks like her tounge is in jail.
Yo mama so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio
Yo mama so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex.
Yo mama so skinny she turned sideways and dissapeared.
Yo mama so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs.
Yo mama so lazy she's got a remote control just to operate her remote!
Yo mama so lazy that she came in last place in a recent snail marathon.
#5
01-03-2006, 12:57 PM
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Lotsa places, currently Metro D.C., USA
Posts: 13,574
RE: Yo Momma...
No... You don't...
•Let's get off moms, 'cause I just got off yours.
•Let's get off moms, 'cause she can't handle those five men on her now.
•I ain't got nuthin' bad to say 'bout Yo mama, 'cause her face says it all!
•I'm sorry, I shouldn't talk about Yo mama, 'cause I don't even know the man.
•Hey keep my mom out of this and I'll keep this out of Yo mama!
•If I wanted a comeback, I'd just wipe it off Yo mama's chin.
•Hey I don't have a mom, me and my dad just use yours!
•Hey, I got nothing to say about Yo Mama 'cause she's a real saint... a Saint Bernard.
•Man, that snap is so old you might as well be bustin' knock knock jokes. And speaking of knock knock, that's what my ***** were doing on Yo Mama's chin last night.
•That was good, but not as good as Yo mama was last night.
•Man, that snaps older than Yo grandma's kick-start vibrator.
• Man, that snaps older than the crust in Yo Mama's underwear.
•Speakin' of Yo mama, when I was doing her doggy style last night, I realized which side of the family you get your looks from.
•(If your car is insulted) Well, it rides better than Yo mama.
•Yo mama's got 1 leg longer than other and they call her call her hip hop.
•Yo mama's got 1 toe & 1 knee and they call her Tony.
•Yo mama's got 3 toes and 3 knees and they call her Toni Tone Tony.
•Yo mama's got a wait problem, she can't wait to eat.
•Yo mama's got an eating disorder, she be eating dis order, dat order, she be eating all the damn orders!
•Yo mama only got one finger and runs around stealing key rings.
•Yo mama's got sideburns on her ****.
•Yo mama's got a bald head with a part and sideburns.
•Yo mama's got a metal afro with rusty sideburns.
•Yo mama's got an afro with a turn signal.
•Yo mama's got 3 tongues and talks like this, like this, like this.
•Yo mama's got a wheelchair with 5-Star rims and a clutch.
•Yo mama's got a peanut butter wig with jelly sideburns.
•Yo mama's got a leather wig with suede sideburns.
•Yo mama's got a wooden leg with termites.
•Yo mama's got a wooden leg with advertisements stapled to it.
•Yo mama's got a wooden leg with a kickstand on it.
•Yo mama's got a wooden leg with a real foot.
•Yo mama's got a peg leg with a kickstand.
•Yo mama's got a wooden leg with an owl's nest in it.
•Yo mama's got a wooden leg with branches.
•Yo mama's got an afro with a chin strap!
•Yo mama's got hair on her tongue and she gargles with curl activator.
•Yo mama's got fake hair, fake eyes and fake nails talkin' bout she wants a real man.
•Yo mama's got more chins than a Chinese phone book.
•Yo mama's panties got more crust than bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken.
•Yo mama's got more weave than a dog in traffic.
•Yo mama's got so much weave, when a fly goes by her hair swats at it.
•Yo mama's got so much dandruff, she needs to defrost it before she combs her hair.
•Yo mama's got so much weave, AT&T uses her extensions as backup lines.
•Yo mama's got no arms or legs and when she goes swimmin' they call her Bob.
•Yo mama's got no fingers talking bout how she wanted to be with the Pointer Sisters.
•Yo mama's got no fingers talking bout how she's gonna press charges.
•Yo mama's got two fingers and she's a representative for world piece.
•Yo mama's got no neck talkin' 'bout how she's all choked up.
•Yo mama's got one ear, talking bout she wants to hear both sides of the story.
•Yo mama's got no ears and was trying on sunglasses.
•Yo mama's got one eye, one leg, one arm and one knee and they call her UNO.
•Yo mama's got one eye on the right and she's talkin' bout' "Make this left."
•Yo mama's got one eye and one leg and they call her IHOP.
•Yo mama's got one leg talkin' bout "Ain't no half steppin."
•Yo mama's got one leg and people call her Ilene.
•Yo mama's got snakeskin teeth.
•Yo mama's got shark teeth.
•Yo mama's got one tooth in front and one in the back talkin' `bout "Give me a bite."
•Yo mama's got so many gaps in her teeth it looks like piano keys.
•Yo mama's got a glass eye with a shade.
•Yo mama's got a glass eye talkin' bout she can see clearly now.
•Yo mama's got a glass tooth with your fourth grade picture in it.
•Yo mama's got an electric wig with a sunroof and opera lights.
•Yo mama's got so many rings around belly she's gotta screw her underwear on.
•Yo mama's got so many teeth missing, it looks like her tongue is in jail.
•Yo mama's got so much hair under her arms, it looks like she's got Buckwheat in a headlock.
•Yo mama's got three fingers and a banjo.
•Yo mama's got three fingers and runs around stealing bowling *****.
•Yo mama's got three fingers talkin' bout "Gimme five."
•Yo mama's got a long sleeved bra.
•Yo mama's got a wooden nipple and they call her Corky.
•Yo mama's got ingrown nipples.
•Yo mama's got three teeth... one in her mouth and two in her pocket.
•Yo mama's got two wooden legs and one is on backward.
•Yo mama ain't got no arms talkin' `bout "I'm hangin' in there."
•Yo mama ain't got no arms talkin' `bout "Raise the roof!"
•Yo mama ain't got no arms talkin' `bout pointing me in the right direction.
•Yo mama ain't got no eyes talkin' bout "I see what you mean."
•Yo mama ain't got no ears talkin' bout "I hear ya."
•Yo mama's got no ears talkin' bout "I don't want to hear it."
•Yo mama's got a glass leg with Kool-Aid in it.
•Yo mama's got a glass leg and uses Windex for lotion.
•Yo mama ain't got no fingers talkin' bout "Oh snap."
•Yo mama ain't got no toes and she bought a pair of sandals.
•Yo mama's got a pair of high top flip flops.
•Yo mama ain't got no legs talkin' bout "I ain't gonna stand for this."
•Yo mama ain't got no legs talkin' bout how she used to kick it.
•Yo mama ain't got no legs talkin' bout how she's gonna run for president.
•Yo mama ain't got no legs talkin' bout how she's running things.
•Yo mama ain't got no legs and you bought her a bike.
•Yo mama ain't got no legs talkin' bout how she's gonna get the new Jordans.
•Yo mama's got no legs and tried out for track.
•Yo mama's got summer teeth... summer in her mouth and summer in her pocket.
•Yo mama's got more crack than Harlem.
That's just page 1... I've got 19 more...
•Let's get off moms, 'cause I just got off yours.
•Let's get off moms, 'cause she can't handle those five men on her now.
•I ain't got nuthin' bad to say 'bout Yo mama, 'cause her face says it all!
•I'm sorry, I shouldn't talk about Yo mama, 'cause I don't even know the man.
•Hey keep my mom out of this and I'll keep this out of Yo mama!
•If I wanted a comeback, I'd just wipe it off Yo mama's chin.
•Hey I don't have a mom, me and my dad just use yours!
•Hey, I got nothing to say about Yo Mama 'cause she's a real saint... a Saint Bernard.
•Man, that snap is so old you might as well be bustin' knock knock jokes. And speaking of knock knock, that's what my ***** were doing on Yo Mama's chin last night.
•That was good, but not as good as Yo mama was last night.
•Man, that snaps older than Yo grandma's kick-start vibrator.
• Man, that snaps older than the crust in Yo Mama's underwear.
•Speakin' of Yo mama, when I was doing her doggy style last night, I realized which side of the family you get your looks from.
•(If your car is insulted) Well, it rides better than Yo mama.
•Yo mama's got 1 leg longer than other and they call her call her hip hop.
•Yo mama's got 1 toe & 1 knee and they call her Tony.
•Yo mama's got 3 toes and 3 knees and they call her Toni Tone Tony.
•Yo mama's got a wait problem, she can't wait to eat.
•Yo mama's got an eating disorder, she be eating dis order, dat order, she be eating all the damn orders!
•Yo mama only got one finger and runs around stealing key rings.
•Yo mama's got sideburns on her ****.
•Yo mama's got a bald head with a part and sideburns.
•Yo mama's got a metal afro with rusty sideburns.
•Yo mama's got an afro with a turn signal.
•Yo mama's got 3 tongues and talks like this, like this, like this.
•Yo mama's got a wheelchair with 5-Star rims and a clutch.
•Yo mama's got a peanut butter wig with jelly sideburns.
•Yo mama's got a leather wig with suede sideburns.
•Yo mama's got a wooden leg with termites.
•Yo mama's got a wooden leg with advertisements stapled to it.
•Yo mama's got a wooden leg with a kickstand on it.
•Yo mama's got a wooden leg with a real foot.
•Yo mama's got a peg leg with a kickstand.
•Yo mama's got a wooden leg with an owl's nest in it.
•Yo mama's got a wooden leg with branches.
•Yo mama's got an afro with a chin strap!
•Yo mama's got hair on her tongue and she gargles with curl activator.
•Yo mama's got fake hair, fake eyes and fake nails talkin' bout she wants a real man.
•Yo mama's got more chins than a Chinese phone book.
•Yo mama's panties got more crust than bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken.
•Yo mama's got more weave than a dog in traffic.
•Yo mama's got so much weave, when a fly goes by her hair swats at it.
•Yo mama's got so much dandruff, she needs to defrost it before she combs her hair.
•Yo mama's got so much weave, AT&T uses her extensions as backup lines.
•Yo mama's got no arms or legs and when she goes swimmin' they call her Bob.
•Yo mama's got no fingers talking bout how she wanted to be with the Pointer Sisters.
•Yo mama's got no fingers talking bout how she's gonna press charges.
•Yo mama's got two fingers and she's a representative for world piece.
•Yo mama's got no neck talkin' 'bout how she's all choked up.
•Yo mama's got one ear, talking bout she wants to hear both sides of the story.
•Yo mama's got no ears and was trying on sunglasses.
•Yo mama's got one eye, one leg, one arm and one knee and they call her UNO.
•Yo mama's got one eye on the right and she's talkin' bout' "Make this left."
•Yo mama's got one eye and one leg and they call her IHOP.
•Yo mama's got one leg talkin' bout "Ain't no half steppin."
•Yo mama's got one leg and people call her Ilene.
•Yo mama's got snakeskin teeth.
•Yo mama's got shark teeth.
•Yo mama's got one tooth in front and one in the back talkin' `bout "Give me a bite."
•Yo mama's got so many gaps in her teeth it looks like piano keys.
•Yo mama's got a glass eye with a shade.
•Yo mama's got a glass eye talkin' bout she can see clearly now.
•Yo mama's got a glass tooth with your fourth grade picture in it.
•Yo mama's got an electric wig with a sunroof and opera lights.
•Yo mama's got so many rings around belly she's gotta screw her underwear on.
•Yo mama's got so many teeth missing, it looks like her tongue is in jail.
•Yo mama's got so much hair under her arms, it looks like she's got Buckwheat in a headlock.
•Yo mama's got three fingers and a banjo.
•Yo mama's got three fingers and runs around stealing bowling *****.
•Yo mama's got three fingers talkin' bout "Gimme five."
•Yo mama's got a long sleeved bra.
•Yo mama's got a wooden nipple and they call her Corky.
•Yo mama's got ingrown nipples.
•Yo mama's got three teeth... one in her mouth and two in her pocket.
•Yo mama's got two wooden legs and one is on backward.
•Yo mama ain't got no arms talkin' `bout "I'm hangin' in there."
•Yo mama ain't got no arms talkin' `bout "Raise the roof!"
•Yo mama ain't got no arms talkin' `bout pointing me in the right direction.
•Yo mama ain't got no eyes talkin' bout "I see what you mean."
•Yo mama ain't got no ears talkin' bout "I hear ya."
•Yo mama's got no ears talkin' bout "I don't want to hear it."
•Yo mama's got a glass leg with Kool-Aid in it.
•Yo mama's got a glass leg and uses Windex for lotion.
•Yo mama ain't got no fingers talkin' bout "Oh snap."
•Yo mama ain't got no toes and she bought a pair of sandals.
•Yo mama's got a pair of high top flip flops.
•Yo mama ain't got no legs talkin' bout "I ain't gonna stand for this."
•Yo mama ain't got no legs talkin' bout how she used to kick it.
•Yo mama ain't got no legs talkin' bout how she's gonna run for president.
•Yo mama ain't got no legs talkin' bout how she's running things.
•Yo mama ain't got no legs and you bought her a bike.
•Yo mama ain't got no legs talkin' bout how she's gonna get the new Jordans.
•Yo mama's got no legs and tried out for track.
•Yo mama's got summer teeth... summer in her mouth and summer in her pocket.
•Yo mama's got more crack than Harlem.
That's just page 1... I've got 19 more...
#6
01-03-2006, 01:12 PM
RE: Yo Momma...
whoa...thats a lot of momma jokes! funny stuff guys!! One of my favorites is
Yo mamma teeth so yellow, you could butter up a whole loath of bread with it...
Yo mamma teeth so yellow, you could butter up a whole loath of bread with it...
#8
01-03-2006, 02:28 PM
RE: Yo Momma...
yo mamma so fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles bopped out
yo mamma so stupid she thoughty a quarterback was a refund
yo mamma so stupid she thoughty a quarterback was a refund
#9
01-03-2006, 05:11 PM
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Lotsa places, currently Metro D.C., USA
Posts: 13,574
RE: Yo Momma...
•Yo mama's so old, she owes Fred Flintstone a food stamp.
•Yo mama's so old, she drove a chariot to high school.
•Yo mama's so old, she's got hieroglyphics on her driver's license.
•Yo mama's so old, she took her drivers test on a dinosaur.
•Yo mama's so old, the key on Ben Franklin's kite was to her apartment.
•Yo mama's so old, she has all the apostles in her black book.
•Yo mama's so old, she DJ'd at the Boston Tea Party.
•Yo mama's so old, she walked into an antique store and they kept her.
•Yo mama's so old, Jurassic Park brought back memories.
•Yo mama's so old, her memory is in black and white.
•Yo mama's so old, she baby-sat for Jesus.
•Yo mama's so old, her social security number is 1.
•Yo mama's so old, when the police asked her for her ID, she gave them a rock.
•Yo mama's so old, her birth-certificate expired.
•Yo mama's so old, her birth-certificate is in Roman numerals.
•Yo mama's so old, she has a Jesus Starter jacket.
•Yo mama's so old, she used to baby-sit Yoda.
•Yo mama's so old, she was a waitress at the last supper.
•Yo mama's so old, she has a picture of Jesus in her yearbook.
•Yo mama's so old, she drove a chariot to high school.
•Yo mama's so old, she's got hieroglyphics on her driver's license.
•Yo mama's so old, she took her drivers test on a dinosaur.
•Yo mama's so old, the key on Ben Franklin's kite was to her apartment.
•Yo mama's so old, she has all the apostles in her black book.
•Yo mama's so old, she DJ'd at the Boston Tea Party.
•Yo mama's so old, she walked into an antique store and they kept her.
•Yo mama's so old, Jurassic Park brought back memories.
•Yo mama's so old, her memory is in black and white.
•Yo mama's so old, she baby-sat for Jesus.
•Yo mama's so old, her social security number is 1.
•Yo mama's so old, when the police asked her for her ID, she gave them a rock.
•Yo mama's so old, her birth-certificate expired.
•Yo mama's so old, her birth-certificate is in Roman numerals.
•Yo mama's so old, she has a Jesus Starter jacket.
•Yo mama's so old, she used to baby-sit Yoda.
•Yo mama's so old, she was a waitress at the last supper.
•Yo mama's so old, she has a picture of Jesus in her yearbook.
#10
01-03-2006, 07:55 PM
RE: Yo Momma...
Got nothing fo "Yo Mama", but just read that ----(?) Valderama from "That 70's Show" is producing a reality show on this exact concept - people going back and forth trying to out-do the other about "Yo Mama". I think it will be on VH-1 or MTV.