Official AF Venting/Advice Thread
#31
well the first girl who you like and is a good friend...don't jeopardize that relationship by trying to change it before its ready to be changed. i think some of the best relationships start from friendship. if there is something deeper there, it will not only remain, but possibly grow into something more when the time is right for both. if you've hinted that you have stronger feelings, then she knows this and i'm sure if she starts to feel the same way as you do, then she'll give you clues. i think lots of times people don't realize what they have. they're too fixated on "the perfect person", which we all know does not exist. also, it takes some people longer than others to discover that we all have something unique and special on the inside, regardless of what we look like on the outside. sure we all like to look at pretty people, but i've known pretty people who become ugly when you get to know them, and vice versa. obviously this girl is important, so keep her close to you.
as for the other girl. being far away is hard. but remember although you see her as average, (and probably comparing her to this other girl) i'm sure she has special qualities too. you have to look for them. why not just persue that relationship as friends. if it grows, it grows, if not at least you took the time to know her, and with her love of cars, she can become a friend too. i'd say yes....invite her to the meet. just see what happens from there.
as for the other girl. being far away is hard. but remember although you see her as average, (and probably comparing her to this other girl) i'm sure she has special qualities too. you have to look for them. why not just persue that relationship as friends. if it grows, it grows, if not at least you took the time to know her, and with her love of cars, she can become a friend too. i'd say yes....invite her to the meet. just see what happens from there.
#32
times are changing. while the best relationships SHOULD start from a friendship, it doesn't seem to happen like that anymore. The problem is with the girls. Its too 'weird' to go from being a friend to something more. At least from everything I've seen/heard/talked about.
#33
True, but, keep in mind that his current was his ex for a reason as well, before they got back together. The important thing is to not get that "scarcity mentality". The idea that you have to be with one of these girls because they're there. There are other girls out there, and if it won't work with one of these, it will work with one (or more ) of the others.
"i fell upon melissa who is a 22 yr old good looking girl. but heres the thing, im leaving for the marines, AND we've already broken up,"
It sounded to me that they broke up because he's leaving for boot camp. I was implying that boot camp isn't that long and if he really likes her that he should give it a try and not give up!
#34
"i fell upon melissa who is a 22 yr old good looking girl. but heres the thing, im leaving for the marines, AND we've already broken up,"
It sounded to me that they broke up because he's leaving for boot camp. I was implying that boot camp isn't that long and if he really likes her that he should give it a try and not give up!
It sounded to me that they broke up because he's leaving for boot camp. I was implying that boot camp isn't that long and if he really likes her that he should give it a try and not give up!
it's cool to remain friends with her, but sex without a condom is a big NO NO! she has motives. that's NOT GOOD. he's better of not dating her.
in my opinion.
#35
True, but I don't know anything about their relationship either. Just because she mentioned kids and marriage doesn't mean he has to get married and have kids, he just has to let her know that he doesn't want that yet and if she has hidden motives they would be apparent without a doubt. You are definitely 100% right about the whole condom situation! Condoms aren't 100% effective though that's why I got fixed.....only 150 dollars
by the way since when isn't a girl looking for marriage or kids?
by the way since when isn't a girl looking for marriage or kids?
#36
sigh. I know one.
*BTW, whats the deal with docs not letting you get fixed before you have kids. I DO NOT want kids. Ever. Excuse me, EVAR. Next move is to tell a doc to do it, or I'll do it myself. Its not hard.
*BTW, whats the deal with docs not letting you get fixed before you have kids. I DO NOT want kids. Ever. Excuse me, EVAR. Next move is to tell a doc to do it, or I'll do it myself. Its not hard.
Last edited by achTTung; 11-21-2008 at 10:06 PM.
#38
True, but I don't know anything about their relationship either. Just because she mentioned kids and marriage doesn't mean he has to get married and have kids, he just has to let her know that he doesn't want that yet and if she has hidden motives they would be apparent without a doubt. You are definitely 100% right about the whole condom situation! Condoms aren't 100% effective though that's why I got fixed.....only 150 dollars
by the way since when isn't a girl looking for marriage or kids?
by the way since when isn't a girl looking for marriage or kids?
**** ghetto!!! you should know better than that! those are exactly the kind of girls you stay away from.
and no condoms aren't 100% but it's necessary even if she say's she's on the pill.
19 year olds dont have vasectomys.
SOMEBODY....come to my defense here!
#39
He's my boy too, it was just an option if he likes her and he needs to express that to her.
Why shouldn't 19 year old boys have a vasectomy? If you don't want kids you should take responsibility of the situation......
Vasectomies are reversible.
Why shouldn't 19 year old boys have a vasectomy? If you don't want kids you should take responsibility of the situation......
Vasectomies are reversible.