If you grind a gear somewhere a kitten dies.

Fire was discovered only after God's copyright expired.

The colors red, green and blue are opposite south of the equator. There they go blue, red, green and yellow.

If a butterfly flaps it's wings in a field in Malaysia it is felt in that 10 inch radius.

Trees grow onlyas tall as its root grow downward.

Landromats were invented by Jesus of Nazareth.

It's been mathematically proven that the number 42 is not an even number and cannot be divided more than 33 times using odd numbers ending with 8.

 

Careful guys, they worklgood when they *almost* sound true. *BEST* is when you think it might actually BE true

 

During the cold war, the Rusians briefly experimented with thermo-nucular hand-grenades, but, after discovering that no amount of steriods could make someone run a mile in under 6-seconds, they gave up on the idea.

 

Do these count?

- Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis

- Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong to a "Who has more *********" contest. Chuck won by 5

 

yeah, I guess they do, but... did YOU make them up, or find them someplace else? Aside from the initial bunch, I'm reasonably sure we've been making our own up. But you'rs ARE funny, so I'm not hatin'

 

Whoops, I got them from somewhere else...I'll come up with some good fictoids to make up for it....I didn't read everything to realize that they had to be entirely original. I just love Chuck Norris facts because they all sound true. Chuck Norris ROCKS!

 

2JZ's cure cancer and so does Chuck Norris.

 

The Exxon Valdez, an oil tanker that gained widespread imfany in 1989 when it spilled over 11 million gallons of crude oil in Prince William Sound, Alaska, was actually hit by a Chinese submarine that was conducting a reconnisaince missionin arctic waters. This new information was leaked to the BBC by a high-ranking Exxon official, who wished to remain anonymous.
An investigation into the incident concluded that other high-ranking Exxon officials covered up this incident in order to hide billions of dollars in bribes given to Exxon by the Chinese government in exchange for more frequent oil shipments to the oil-starved country. The United States is currently the world's #1 consumer of oil, but experts predict that China will overtake the United States within three years.

 

lol @ Chuck Norris won by 5...

 

Sorry to go off topic - but does Chuck use his like ball-bearings to scoot across floors quicker?

Inquiring minds like to know [&:]