dont laugh guys/gals but i feel as though i have nobody else to talk to... my brother died a few years back, my girl for almost 3 years cheated on my with 6 guys who she confessed to, and now my dad left me after making a seen at my grad party (parents are divorced and he lives somewhere else but showed up to tell me he wants nothing more to do with me)...

all of my friends left and went off to school... so i literally have nobody to talk to ever.

example, today, i sat at my computer, in my boxers all day... allllll day... i watched probably 5 hours of house, 3 hours of comedy central, and the end of saving private ryan... never ate or got up... ive listened to an itunes playlist like 10 times and researched everything about a big turbo upgrade even though i can only dream of it...

i can never sleep anymore because of thinking about how much i loved my girlfriend only to have her text me telling me how much she misses other guys... even though i picked her up from a cop car drunk and letting her sleep in my bed while i took the couch and then driving her home the next day so her mom doesnt find out to save her... and she just says all this **** every day about other guys... seriously...

and my god damn dad... he wrote me off like i was nothing, said adopting me was a huge mistake and was sure my mom agreed... and im beginnig to believe it cause she's kicked me out a few times so ive lived on couches and clothes in garbage bags for weeks at a time...

im always hungry, but can never eat, 115lb 19 year old is not good... i lift, and get stronger but never gain weight...

and my friggin car... turns out it was just a gift from my step dad cause he felt bad for me... great, now its on me. and its about to get really expensive with a timing belt job that has to get done and no money.

and school... i go to a cc because of being kicked out and not being able to graduate on time... but im friggin smart as hell, not to brag, but test scores are so high and everything, im in calculus, physics, 2 engineering classes, and economics as a first year and its EASY! which makes one more thing on the list, i have nothing to keep me busy.

Used to have a job which helped but got into a fight with a waitress cause shes a total bitch and just left one day never to go back.

ugh whatever.. i guess [/rant off]

 

sorry to hear that man, i know internet friends arent the best friends but hey atleast you got us, just dont start drinking or **** youll regret, find some car meets around your area and have a good time, it seems your closest with your mum at the moment so try to get to know her better. ive been down that road before and the fact i ended up loosing my "good audi" and $18k in scholarships and grants and endig up in some crappy community college didnt help, just keep pushing on. remember friends come and go just make the most of them.

 

i wish i was close to my mom, but she doesnt care to be honest... like youll say shes my mom and has to but she doesnt...

as far as drinking.. ha um, woops? at least i stopped the pot though, that got bad and tempts me everyday you have no idea

 

Hey man, I'm really sorry to hear about that stuff you are going through. It sounds like you have gone through and are continuing to experience some really hard times. If it helps all, I'm 19 and am going through a rough spot as well. Before this year, no one in my entire family has died and I was extremely blessed by that - I love all of my family members very much even though they can be annoying at times. In these past 2 months, both of my grandfathers have passed away and the effect it has had on my life is pretty drastic. I have a similar girl story, and I still find it hard not to love her and think about her even though she really devastated and broke me.

I graduated last year (2007) and tried to go to a local CC, but I never really made it through, as I was depressed and socially alone. Now as I go to college (paying for it in loans, no help from parents) i'm pretty nervous as I'm socially behind by a year and everyone in my grade is younger than me. This summer was fun, but I have 3 more weeks before school starts and all my my friends are gone again, and i've been spending the last week or so just like you, naked in front of the computer (well, almost naked). staying up until 4... sleeping in until 1... endless cycle of nothing. Researching, forums, check email, facebook, repeat

Lastly, I consider myself to be similar to you smart wise - I get great test scores when I try but I never am able to get my homework done. I can sit down and tell myself I'm gonna do it, but then i get instantly distracted by something, and never do it. I'm thinking I have ADHD, but I dont wanna blame stuff like that for my failures unless its completely true

</rant>

 

I get about 4 phone calls a month, live alone, work virtually alone, see people I know outside of work 1-2 days a week.
I put in 5hrs of overtime today because I had nothing better to do. I'd have sat in my boxers at the apartment too, except I dont have cable or internet there. Forces me to go out, fortunately I can use the equipment at work to screw around with the car. Only thing that I really focus on.

Sucks about your girlfriend. Last girlfriend I had was 2 years ago. Slowly broke apart after an end of semester party in canada she had with some friends (they were all under 21). Joking, I said, no dirty needles, and dont **** anyone.
Well, she got the needle part right.... some french bastard. Not french canadian, straight up french. Wouldn't give me the satisfaction of beating his frail little french *** into the ground. I had no clue where to find him. I'll screw around with a girl if the opportunity comes up, on the off chance I actually go out, but yeah, girls **** you up.

sucks about your dad too. theres no excuse for that, and its an ******* thing to say it was a mistake to raise you.

my family is together, but always busy with something. I moved 4 hrs to VT in february. Nobody has had the time to come see what I do, or where I live in 6 months. They called a couple times a month at first, but now I don't hear from them much. My grandmother was in pretty serious shape a month or two ago, wondered if she was gonna come out of the hospital alive. Well, the rest of the family wondered. I didn't know she was in the hospital. Found out thru my cousins myspace page.

I'm 26, about 115. Been that way since highschool. 'Wirey' my grandmother used to say. Im a little guy, but I can do handstand pushups, and I've climbed a rope with just my arms with 40lbs of padlocks in a backpack just to see if I could.

I went to a community college, i was there 2 1/2 years. never graduated. refused to take classes like gym, or english 101. Learned what I thought I needed, and called it quits.

Point is, you're not the only one with your problems. Sounds a lot like we both have the same problems. 2 differences. I've had these problems for 7 years longer than you, and I have an outlet (my job). Benefits me in 2 ways. While I might not have much of a social life, long hrs at work gets me paid, and that money gets spent on the car, on the days I don't feel like working 15hrs.

So I'd suggest changing something. I was at my worst before I started at Rennline, decided then I needed a serious change. I went from a crappy job, not many friends (hung out with people, but could barely call them friends, they'd stab you in the back for anything) to a job I like doing, and that lets me mod my car, and I at least have a couple people around I can relate to, even if I dont hang out with them often.

Wanna make a big change? I have a spare bedroom I've been trying to rent. $400 a month, plus half the utilities.

2 TT's parked out front would be badass.

 

^^ its like we are the same person... seriously, i go forum, email, facebook, maybe couple auto sites, then back to the forum to see if anyone responded to what i said...

as far as homework, i never did it either... but as far as test, i scored 99th percentile on my placement test for college... no joke i can scan it in haha.

seriously though, it really sucks not being able to laugh, are talk to someone, or be with someone... even the damn random picture thread doesnt make me laugh, i say lol or haha to try and fit it with people who are faceless to me yet are the only people i have haha. what a creeper i sound like

 

well, to be honest that sucks and I guess I'm pretty lucky I have had the life I'm living.


As for the girl problem, my only advice is move one and find someone new, it's obvious that she doesn't love you (at least right now) and that she is probably using you because she knows that you still have feelings for her.

Take my lifestyle and don't get into serious relationships. Sure it might be "shallow" and sometime I envy those with serious relationships because they seem like so much fun, but then I go out with the guys for a night of Shenanigans and I realize I have the rest of my life to be tied to one girl. Also my longest relationship was about 3 months. For some reason I can't keep em around longer than that.

As for school, I am paying for about half of my school and I'm fine with it. I've realized that any debt I get into because of education will pay me back later in life with greater opportunities. I was even willing to go as far as 200K in debt for school, but my parents told me they wouldn't let me do it. (apparently UC Boulder wasn't a good enough school to warrant 200K in loans:P)

AS for the Family issues, man that sucks, I'm not sure what I would do or what you should do on that one.

 

dude, dont stay in your room, go out, meet people that will help, im sure, God bless You man...

 

Wanna make a big change? I have a spare bedroom I've been trying to rent. $400 a month, plus half the utilities.

haha well im in school here in rochester, ny... im triyng to better myself and then someday call my dad up and prove to him im more that he could imagine and better off... i do need to get out though haha, and need a room mate lol

 

lumend is right, you just need to get out there and meet new people. Not that I am one to speak of it, but one of the biggest reasons i'm making the decision to go to college is to force myself to get out of my comfort/depression zone and just go have fun and meet people.

But i'm sorry your dad said the things he did, they are not true and don't ever believe what he says. If it means anything to you, you will be in my prayers!

God Bless,
Neil