Chuck Norris does not drive not because he cant, and not because he has the $ to have someone drive him around, but because there is no car made out there that can handle him.

 

Oh and drifting was invented by Chuck Norris when he side kicked a car around a corner because it was in his way.

 

Nunchuck - is Japanese for "almost hits as hard as Chuck Norris"

 

You no when you women is clearly pissed about something, but no matter how many times you ask her what's wrong its always "nothing's the matter".

Well that's because she's thinking about how much more of a man Chuck Norris is than you. [:-]

 

This is slightly tasteless:



In 1993 Chuck Norris invented a time machine.

He traveled back in time to Dallas, November 22 1963. He then ran in front of the presidential motorcade, where he proceded to Punch all the incoming bullets out of mid-air, and roundhouse kicked the magic bullet, before anyone got hit. Then he killed all the shooters on the grassy knoll just by looking at them.


JFK was so f*cking amazed that his head exploded.

 

Why is Chuck Norris kicking a Kangaroo in 98.5's sig???



Ever seen pics of the Solid Silver Audi? sure every 1 has right?
know who owns it?
...noone does - Chuck Norris Chopped the owner
in the throat for doing such a thing...

 

Because ever since Chuck Norris got into a fight with Mick Dundee, he hates everything Australian.

 

Psssssssst

chuck wants to share something with you....
peek here